Six Down; Two to Go!

Six down and two to go! Rianne has endured shot after painful shot in the spine these past three weeks and only has a week left until she gets a break before she begins radiation.
On Monday of this week she received her third Rituxan Infusion and her third Methotrexate Injection, an intrathecal medication that she has responded well to during the first two weeks. This week, however, she struggled with it. What should have been tolerable for her became a monotonous headache for days. On Tuesday and Wednesday she hardly left her bed, as the headaches and fatigue made her horribly uncomfortable. The only remedies she had to combat the pain were her pain killers, an icebag and sleep. She kept the icebag full for days and placed it on her head practically non-stop. Luckily, her appetite was normal and she continued to eat well enough to function properly. She did, however, become highly constipated due to the effects of the oxycodone.
Thursday morning was absolutely awful! We headed to Coos Bay for her Cytarabine Injection and she was miserable from the moment we locked the front door. Her head was aching so badly that she planted her icebag on top of it. We were driving along just north of Port Orford when she leaned forward and vomited into a plastic bag. Usually she begs me to pull the van over, but this time she gave me no warning. It startled me so much that I briefly lost my concentration on the road. I took a second look at her and noticed that she was balancing the icebag on her head AND vomiting AT THE SAME TIME! I’ll admit, it was a first for me, as I’ve never seen anything like it before! I snatched the bag off of her head to help comfort her and we continued down the road.
When we got to Bandon she said, “I just need to throw up and get it all out.” I knew what she meant – that she was miserable and had some nausea from the chemo and her anxiety. But what she ACTUALLY meant was that she had to “get it all out” – which she did. She vomited again and again and again, literally emptying her stomach in the process. I’m humbled every time she goes through pain or any kind of a setback. She doesn’t complain, or cry, or plead for help – she just gets through it. When I need to throw up I make some sort of an announcement to her, become dramatic and get very vocal, including some follow up complaining. Rianne simply puts a bag beneath her chin and doesn’t make a sound. She continues to amaze me throughout this entire ordeal, as her tolerance for pain and discomfort seems to have no limit!
We arrived at Bay Area Hospital at 10:00 for her Blood Draw, then returned to the van so she could rest before her injection at 12:00. As she rested, she looked horribly uncomfortable, yet didn’t complain. I wrote her discomforts on a list to present to her oncologist, which included the consistent headache, neckache, balance, comprehension, nausea and anxiety to name a few. The previous evening I called her oncologist due to the severity of her headache and he informed me that we may need to stop the injections if her condition worsens. He explained that the more shots she receives, the more uncomfortable she’ll possibly become. As I sat next to her in the van, I decided to tell her oncologist to call off the final three injections, as she looked absolutely miserable and I doubted that she could endure any more of it.
At 11:45 we left the van and I told Rianne that I was ready to call off the final three shots. She responded with, “I want to finish them, no matter what it takes.” Once again, I was amazed at her resilience. There she was, hardly able to walk in a straight line, yet she was ready for more poison to be injected into her feebly body.
When we entered the hospital room, she lied down on the bed and remained motionless for the procedure. The surgeon inserted the enormous needle into her spine, the oncologist injected her with the Cytarabine and she recovered in the bed for an hour. I sat by her bed in near darkness, as the light caused her headache to intensify. She was miserable, yet wanted me to read my “Ghost Bull” story to her. The story of the elk I killed last year helps her relax, or should I say fall asleep! At 2:00 we left the room and prepared for the ride home.
I expected the drive home to be unbearable for her. She had been miserable that morning and, to add insult to injury, she received another injection of Cytarabine, the toughest drug she has had to deal with. We headed to McDonalds to get her a plain hamburger and some fries again and instantly she began to feel better. We’re not sure what it is - the hour of recovery after the injections or the burger or the combination of both, but whatever it is, it has worked for the rides home. She still had a headache, but the nausea was gone and she felt good enough to even hold a conversation with me!
The first two weekends following the Thursday Cytarabine Injections have been intolerable for Rianne. After hearing the oncologist explain that the road could get tougher with each injection, I feared the worst for this weekend. Yesterday (Friday) I woke quietly to let Rianne get some sleep, as it tends to help the most. Instead she woke up, got out of bed, ate a light breakfast and went outside on the deck to work on her plants. It was the first time in over a week that she stayed on her feet for a substantial amount of time. She still had a headache, but it was mild. She rested on the couch for most of the day, but was feeling better. Later, we went back outside and hung up a few more hummingbird feeders, then watched the series called “Roswell”, which has been a good way to keep her relaxed and engaged.
Every day is a different day, which is why we were concerned about what we would face today. But, once again, Rianne woke feeling decent. She had a stomach ache, which she fought off with a light breakfast, then she went outside and lounged on the deck. She rested in her recliner in the shade, read a book and watched the hummingbirds as they used the feeders. I gave her dog, Wickett, a grooming and she felt good enough to help me with some much-needed touch ups on her. She paced herself well today, resting again on the couch and watching more of Roswell. Now, at 10:30 on Saturday night, she is still resting and relaxing. What could have been an awfully tough weekend on her has actually turned into a relaxing one!
Tomorrow is another day and on Monday we will return to Coos Bay for another injection. We hope she will do well again tomorrow like she did today and yesterday. It’s a relief to see her up and moving around, especially when she isn’t busy balancing an icebag on her head!